"Boyfriend's Trip Canceled by Mom's Disapproval: Carolyn Hax's Advice for 30-Somethings"

A woman is frustrated when her boyfriend cancels their private trip after his mother says no. She feels that it's not his mother's place to dictate their plans and believes he needs to take responsibility for his own life. However, the bigger issue is that her boyfriend insults her and believes she was raised badly. This reveals a controlling and presumptuous value system, leading the woman to question her own beliefs. She is advised to seek counseling to regain confidence and learn how to establish boundaries. In a separate question, someone wonders if confiding in a married neighbor about a serious health issue was inappropriate, realizing that using personal suffering to gain intimacy is not acceptable.