Harvard Researcher's 10 Questions to Boost Social Likability
Harvard Business School professor Alison Wood Brooks has shared a set of ten open-ended questions designed to make individuals more likable in social interactions. These questions, adapted from psychologist Arthur Aron's famous 36 questions that foster romantic connection, are intended to help people build rapport in professional and casual settings. Brooks argues that asking thoughtful questions is more effective than trying to impress others with wit or accomplishments. The strategy relies on the psychological principle of reciprocal liking, where showing genuine interest in others makes them more receptive to you.
Key points
- Alison Wood Brooks, a behavioral research scientist at Harvard Business School, presented ten questions on The Diary of a CEO podcast.
- The questions are adapted from Arthur Aron's 36 questions, which are known to accelerate romantic bonding.
- Brooks suggests that asking questions is a more reliable path to likability than displaying charm or listing achievements.
- The questions are open-ended, allowing the other person to talk about themselves, which is a common human preference.
- Asking follow-up questions signals genuine interest and triggers the principle of reciprocal liking.
- The questions include topics like recent excitement, skills one dislikes, and things one is bad at but enjoys.
Background
This topic aligns with broader discussions on human interaction and social dynamics, such as the 2026-09-01 report on 'robotoid humanness,' which warns that AI interactions might alter human behavior. While that study focuses on the negative impacts of machine-like mirroring, Brooks' research emphasizes the positive impact of human-centric curiosity and vulnerability in building connections. The archive also notes a 2026-08-14 report on rising colorectal cancer in under-50s, which, while unrelated, reflects a general trend in health and behavioral science reporting.
Why it matters
In an era where social anxiety and digital communication dominate, understanding the mechanics of likability can improve professional networking, personal relationships, and mental well-being. By shifting focus from self-promotion to active listening and curiosity, individuals can reduce social friction and build stronger, more authentic connections. This approach is backed by established psychological principles, making it a practical tool for anyone seeking to enhance their social presence.
What to watch
The article notes that these questions are a starting point, and follow-up questions are essential for deepening conversations. Readers are encouraged to practice these questions in various social settings to observe their impact on rapport and likability. Further research may explore the long-term effects of consistent use of these questions in professional and personal relationships.
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